Saturday, January 20, 2007

Because I need to laugh, or something.

It's been a heavy week for my blog, and I think we all need to laugh. I can't guarantee that you'll laugh, but these things make me giggle a bit. Husband frequently accuses me of cracking myself up. He's right. I think I'm pretty funny sometimes. Funny looking too, actually.

So here's some rather funny (more the strange than the haha) about me...
  1. I pee with the door open. Most other things I do in the bathroom I do with the door closed, but for some reason I forget to close the door if I'm just peeing. Husband is totally grossed out by this bad habit of mine. I tell him, "Hey, I'm only peeing, what's the big deal?" His answer: "It's not the peeing, it's the wiping." Me: "Oh...I see your point."
  2. I have a blankie. It's not the same blankie as when I was little (I finally retired that one in college), but it serves the same function. And it's not nice and soft, it's crocheted from cheap acrylic yarn so the blanket is pretty scratchy. That's what the first husband used to call it, "Scratchy". He used to hide it from me, so he wouldn't have to sleep with it next to him. What an ass he was.
  3. I used to go places where it was customary to exist without attire. (Oh, Lordee, I hope that phrase was innocent enough not to bring certain goog.l.ers my way.) In particular there was a spa in Napa that I would go to with the first husband. Absolutely lovely natural hot spring that forbade any romantic displays of any kind, and it was strictly enforced. It was a very family place actually. Plenty of kids and babies. You always had to sit on your towel, and I found that comforting. The spa offered its patrons a string of beads to wear around the neck as an indication that that patron did not wish to be spoken to. Husband cringes when I talk about wanting to go there again. He loves his clothing and wants to keep it that way.
OK, so maybe none of that was actually funny-ha ha. It was all just strange. It's my way of scaring away my readers. If you can handle this, then you can handle tomorrow's post. Stay tuned... (Feel free to comment with a funny-strange or ha, ha. Like I said, I need to laugh, and you may need to laugh as well, after tomorrow that is...)

14 comments:

BerryBird said...

I love the idea of a string of beads you can wear so nobody will talk to you, although I will also admit to wishing that concept could be expanded to the world at large.

I do not have a blankie, but I do have a hugging pillow. It is just a small camping pillow, but it is great to hug while drifting off to sleep and provides a little support, too.

a/k/a Nadine said...

I really would've like that string of beads this week in particular.

My senior year in college I shared an apartment with 3 other girls. It had two bathrooms directly across the hall from each other. We would often leave the doors open so we could chat while using the facilities (sidenote: In public, please don't talk to me in the ladies room. Time for that string of beads again.) We struggled to adapt our ways second semester when one of the girls sublet to a guy friend of ours.

Thanks for the strange (funny).

Unknown said...

I'm with the hubby, I'll keep my clothes, give me the necklace anyway though.

M said...

I'm getting a good giggle- but mainly at your new pics! I love Waldorf & Stattler & Beaker and the other one (forgot him!)- so so so funny!!!

Yup, and I think you're onto something with the beads!

Veronika said...

I'm going out to buy beads!
My bathroom door should be removed because we never close it!
Thanks for the laughs!!

Jon said...

Scare away your readers? We're all tuning in to see what comes next!

Anonymous said...

Dude, its just pee!

I confess to rolling my eyes and snorking a bit when I read about women freaking out because in 1-3-5-10-howevermany years with their husband/partner/howzitcalled, they have NEVER peed in front of him.

Lessee - you'll have sex with the man but won't empty your bladder where he can hear? C'mon!

Maybe its because growing up, my favorite Grandma (Char's namesake) had a half-bath off her kitchen (it was in the nook under the stairs, actually), and everyone would just use it and continue their conversations. I dunno. Just never seemed like such a big deal.

My funny - I'll continue in the pee theme - I *must* go to the bathroom immediately before trying to go to sleep. Even if I brush my teeth and pee before climbing into bed, if I sit up reading for more than about 5 minutes - I have to get back up and pee again. I think my parents must have done something involving classical conditioning when they were potty training me!

Aurelia said...

My husband feels the same way about seeing me pee, and he's seen me give birth!
I used to close the door, but after I had my first baby I couldn't do it anymore. If I left him alone in his crib, he cried so much I couldn't relax. And the playpen didn't fit in the bathroom, so I had to leave the door open and let him crawl around in and out.
Now, I have to keep one ear out for fights. So the door is always open, and my husband thinks I'm nuts.
I love the blankie.

Ol' Lady said...

Everyone in our house closes the bathroom door and it stays closed until they are done 'whatever' and they open the door themselves. When I, the mom, try to go into the bathroom and close the door it doesn't even get a chance to 'click' someone is opening it to get something or ask something...my GSD even follows me in!! I really haven't bothered to try and close the door for years...what's the point.
I too have a blankie :) and Ol Man does not like the feel of it either, so I have it folded in half lengthwise and only on my side of the bed.
I would like some beads please!
By the sounds of it tomorrow will be exciting around here so I will be back ;)

Alyce said...

Love the beads idea.

Never got into the habit of leaving bathroom doors open, but I remember when I was a little kid, nudity was never a big deal. My brothers and I were pretty close in age and often bathed together. (I am sure it was eaier for mom then running and supervising three individual baths). But we were rotten kids. We had this game or prank we'd play. We'd all get out of the tub, wrap ourselves in towels, and run, still dripping water and covered in leftover bubbles, into the living room shouting "I'm naked" at the top of our lungs. We'd get a good laugh from mom, and then griped at about the water on the floor.

Well, at one point she was dating a man and they planned to marry, and we pulled our little trick WHILE THEY WERE MEETING WITH THE PRIEST!

Needless to say, after that, modesty was a topic of conversation in our house.

Dino said...

If I try to close the bathroom door I have 2 upset kitties scratching it and meowing so I never bother.

I am not a big fan of cloths and tend to walk around half nakid. That spas sounds were european but I never heard about the beads Love that idea. In Germany you have signs in the showers of the public swiming pools to remove your swim suits prior to taking a shower and Saunas are done while just in a towel

Cibele said...

Hi Nicole,
I am so glad to see that you are doing better. If you can use some extra virtual hugs and I am sending you some more on your way.
I had fun reading you post today. I though I was the only one that pees with the door open. DH hates is too! Actually, that is a habit that runs in my family LOL
Today I am not feeling so good, if you stop by my blog you will see why! I am sure that better days will come soon... for all of us

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

I always used to leave the door open when I peed, but when I moved in with husband #3, I stopped--because of my son! But there is less openess in the bathroom in this family than in prior nuclear families.

I used to go to a Lot of nude events when I was younger. I have to say that I am less interested in being nude in public now that I am older.

I like the idea of the silence beads a LOT though!

I had several experiences as a CLOTHED person walking accidentally on a nude beach. Carrying cameras, not knowing it was a nude beach. Very embarrassing.

When I was in Slovenia, many people were nude at the beaches AND other people were dressed and it didn't matter to them if you were old or young, pretty or fat or what. You dressed or didn't dress and no one seemed to care. I like that sense of freedom to not be judged. Or if you wanted to judge, you kept your opinions to yourself or were discreet about them.

Unknown said...

It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one who pees with the door open. When I have company, of course I close the door... but when it's just me (and sometimes my son) the door's open. A slight parenting concept I guess.

I grew up in a household where clothing was VERY limited and of course am slightly comfortable.... but I don't think that anyone would catch me lounging on the couch watching TV in the buff.

Having beads is such a GREAT idea! It would be nice if everyone had that concept... clothed or not.

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