Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Here we go again?

I only have the energy for a very brief update. I am emotionally drained. After a few hours at the wine store stocking the shelves with our latest delivery, I made my hourly trip to the bathroom. The obsessive toilet paper watching suddenly revealed something not so benign. Bright red blood, about a dime in diameter.

I called the doctor and I am scheduled for a scan tomorrow morning at 8:30am. I have mild cramping, but not the painful lower backache I had with the first miscarriage. I am terrified, angry and just plain sad. Just so very sad.

If there is a heartbeat tomorrow, I still won't feel must better given that the last time all of this occurred we saw a heartbeat then too (only to lose the little guy one week later). I am thinking it may be time for a specialist. I will let you all know tomorrow what the scan showed, if anything.

15 comments:

Julia said...

Oh, Nicole, I am sorry. This sucks. I will check in again tomorrow for the scan results. In fact, I think I will crash your stat counter tomorrow by refreshing madly.
I hope hope hope this is one of those "nothing" deals. Have they been tracking your progesterone with the betas? Do you think you can get a blood draw for it tomorrow? If it's on the low side, maybe supplementing would be all that is needed.

My Reality said...

I hope you aren't going there again. Wishing you much luck with the scan tomorrow.

Jason and Samantha said...

((HUGS))

I'm hoping it's a "normal" bleed.

Please keep us posted.

M said...

Please please please please please let it be nothing...

Thinking of you x

Aurelia said...

Shit fuck damn, I hope it is just a tiny bit of overexertion, but, well, I don't know what to say sweetie.

Meantime, take some extra prometrium and I'll cross my fingers and ovaries for you.

Renee said...

I hope everything is fine.

three minute palaver said...

Oh God Nicole, I hope this is only implantation bleeding. You're in my thoughts.

Caro said...

Hope everything is ok and will be checking back for scan results.

Casey said...

I'm pulling for you, Nicole.

The Oneliner (Christina) said...

oh no.no!no! i am hopeful that it is just the universe fvcking wiht you. oh, i so hope so. crossing everything i got.

Nadine said...

Hugs! Thinking good thoughts for you...

Sara said...

crossing all my fingers that this is just a bump in the road, Nicole.

Let us know the outcome of the scan, if you can...

thrice said...

Oh Nicole, I'm not letting go of hope yet. A dime of blood is quite normal. I had bleeding in both pregnancies and they gave me live babies.

I know this sucks. Ask if you have a subchrionic hematoma, it will explain the bleeding. {{{hugs}}}

Dino aka Katy said...

i am keeping my fingers crossed for you

Barbara said...

I hope tomorrow comes quickly and all is well.

There are "anti-miscarriage" drugs I think.